Last night, I felt compelled to write the message below before drifting off to sleep. It was the first time I told a couple of the stories, and the first time I told them all in one place. I have been quietly navigating through and around these stories all of my life. But I wondered if my words and sleep would drift together over the sea beneath my window. Would I feel more alone and isolated if the stories floated, dispersed, and disappeared into the atmosphere? And then, this morning, I woke up and found so many responses. A gathering of the souls. And I feel such deep gratitude. And relief. And Seen. And believed. Responded to by so many of you. I received your stories, too, with care and understanding. Here is what I posted before the drifting.
I understand completely. I never reported the relative's sexual abuse when I was a young girl because he threatened me. I never reported the nationally respected health professional's sexual harassment because no one would have believed me. I never reported the rising star composer's abrupt hand on my breast, without permission or invitation, because I had no allies in that milieu. I never reported the well-known journalist's sexual harassment and predatory behavior because he had way too much power over my future. I understand completely.
October 12, 2017